An Elf's Adventures in the City State of Baron GayLord.
Read from start to ensure you follow what is happening

02 May 2005

Riding Out to the First Battle

The City State's army road out to meet the undead army today. I was unsure of which army was coming, as my spies had not discerned whether it would be the High Priest Bonkinyerwife-Behindyurbak, or the Queen Phealmahtites. I decided to ride out with the baggage train behind the warriors in order to be there if medicinal help was required.

Late in the day, we came upon Phealmahtites army. The Undead army was amassed on a hill in the distance. Still, I was able to discern the battle standard of the Queen.

"Phealmahtites", I said to myself, in astonishment.
"You'd like that, wouldn't you!", I heard one of the warriors next to me say.
"Oh, he is vane isn't he! He just assumes because he's straight everyone wants him!", stated another.

I really couldn't follow what they were talking about. I just put it down to normal human strangeness. Maybe they were just upset at being given the task of guarding the baggage train. They even seemed to have something against me being "straight". What did they expect, not every person is "crooked". Still, I didn't reply to such a barb in case it degenerated into a name calling contest.

The armies lined up opposite each other, but by nightfall neither general had made a move to initiate a battle. I wondered if a night conflict would take place, as the Undead really have no need for sleep. Still, Baron GayLord's army decided to retire for the night, and a camp was crudely constructed.

I wandered the camp at night, from fire to fire. I was amazed to see some women in dresses amongst the drunken warriors, as I don't recall any riding out with us that day. I know a normal baggage train would have many of the warriors wives, but none seemed to have accompanied their husbands on this journey. Still, some of them had obviously found their way here. I was worried though, as some of the women seemed to have beards and facial hair. I assumed those ones were just trollops who followed warriors everywhere. They looked way too homely to ever get married, and none of them had wedding bands. Still, I guess a warrior away from home will play up. These trollops seemed to be getting plenty of attention from the warriors.

Some of the warriors must have been very drunk, as I swear, they seemed to be all over each other. I guess alcohol does that to humans. They have some, and it arouses all sorts of desires in them. Too much, and they can't tell a man from a woman. The dark night probably didn't help much either.

I retired early, as I wanted to make sure I was rested for the next day. There would be plenty of wounded. Though the Undead are easy to kill, there are very many of them, and I beleive I counted two of them for every warrior we had. It would be a busy day.

I wondered if Gaylord could overcome her, Phealmahtites, and win the day. Phealmahtites! It's a big ask of any man. Still, I think he could get it out there and give her a good thrashing. He didn't seem to be looking forward to it though.

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